Waiting for you..............

My hopes were that you would miss me enough to be the man you have never dared to be. My hopes were that you would find my doorstep in the rain and tell me that you truly cannot live without me.  My hopes were that we would matter enough for you to step from the inside of the façade you have been living to try something real for a change. My hope was that I actually mattered and parts of me know in some places that I do. I know I do in the places in which count the most.  The places that you hold as your person are the ones I cannot fight….not the feelings from your heart.

My eyes are the color of your eyes.  My heart is as warm as the depths of your own.  Together a quiet peace bonds us through it all.  You are in my heart as I am in yours and we each know this. The fight is not to feel it.  The fight is to remain true to the things in which we both want to remain loyal to.  The fight is not to give in.  As it would be to easy to settle on just one when the whole world out there may hold something better.

The truth is that what we are finding that would seem to imply better is empty.  As I am on your mind as you are on mine.  Sex with strangers and grasping for the small things in which interest another rather than producing our true selves is a common.  And we feel nothing at all except small moments of satisfaction. As once again we remain imprisoned by what we know to be the truth.

I am the freedom you want to feel while you’re the stability I want to learn.  I am the hippie with the flowers in my hair dreaming of the purest love.  You are a constant who prefers habitual truths.  I am far more honest than you know how to deal with and you are far more guarded than one should be.

Give it up.  Come to my door in the light of our moons.  Find me and know that to let me go is a loss you will live with always.  Hold me close to your heart so that I breathe you in and make me believe that this is what I think it is.  Fear not the rejection of your love as you must show it in order to fully gain it.  Lay your loyalty at my feet and I will offer you the same.  You cannot let me go….no matter how hard you try.